Something about our ‘Op-Ed’ assertion ‘everything will be fine in a few months, don’t worry about it. Besides, there are limits to the moral corruption, self-destructiveness and sheer stupidity of people’ was a little off; we’re not sure exactly what the suspicious element is, but until further notice disregard the whole thing. We no longer stand by it.
The entire seven thousand word article on that shopkeeper in Kabul by reporter Tom Chapman was basically a lie. Via fax, apparently from Kabul, Mr Chapman sends his regrets, however these, too, may be somewhat mendacious. Our fact-checkers are, at this very moment, at work establishing Mr Chapman’s regrets’ sincerity. (As a side-line, a team of no fewer than six qualified grammaticians are working on the apostrophic placements relating to Mr Chapman and his regrets.)
A number of us on the editorial staff gave up smoking last week; this is beginning to look like a mistake, as well. A bad one.
Reviewing the book A History of Cough Medicine, Robert Hines tangentially mentioned that he felt Jonathan Franzen’s novel The Corrections was ‘longer than God’s beard and about as tangled’. Obviously the length and tangledness of the Heavenly Father’s beard – if, indeed, He sports one – cannot be quantified and therefore should not be employed in the disparagement of books. Forgive us this trespass.
In our interview with Elliot Perlman we forgot the apparently obligatory reference to his good looks. We regret the omission: for a writer, Mr Perlman is strikingly handsome.
The word ‘Helsinki’ appeared several times in our travel section, most notably in the piece about Finland, and was correctly spelled on each occasion. However it’s our opinion that it should be spelled ‘Helsinky’ and henceforth it will appear that way in these pages. Do not try to stop us: we think it looks much better.
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